Abam told a story

Dear Maryam,

Last night i didnt sleep alone. Abam slept with mama. And Abam told a story:

Abam : Mama
Mama : Yes
Abam: Baby go heaven
Mama: Why?
Abam: Baby cough, baby muntah
Mama: Then?
Abam: Uncle take baby,(hand as if cradling a baby), then put baby inside (hand gestured
downwards). Baby go heaven
Mama: Do you see baby?
Abam : Baby sleep with Hayesh here.

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As I walk this journey of a bereaved parent, I notice that my whole world changed. My beliefs aren't the same. My priorities aren't the same and my future is changed forever. My whole life has been shattered, and I didn't know where to begin to pick up the pieces or if I even had the will to pick up the pieces.

Everyone around me, even though very attentive to me, continued functioning in their lives. I didn't know where I fit in any more. I was alone, trying to figure out what happened in that split second when they told me Maryam was gone