The Pain

Dear Maryam,

I never knew how to describe my pain of losing you. Sometimes it is purely emotional, at times it is physical. Physical as in i could feel my heart broke into a million pieces, this tight thingy forming at the base of my throat, my chest feels like it is going to collapsed inward, puncturing my lungs with my ribs.

Sometimes when i look at your pictures, i feel fine. Until i put myself in that picture, and you came to life. I can feel the softness of your skin, i can hear your voice, i can see your smile.

Then the pain will come.

I just hope someday the pain would go away and i could really cherish your life.

I love you.


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3 comments:

  1. hudaJuly 12, 2010 at 2:50 PM

    Mamamaryam,

    Saya faham perasaan itu, sama dengan apa yang saya rasa semasa saya kehilangan adik saya. Mmg tak ada kata-kata nak gambarkan keadaan itu dan tak ada ayat yang boleh pujuk atau redakan perasaan itu. Kuatkan hati dan pujuk hati tu bahawa tempat Maryam skrg adalah tempat yang paling baik yang kita sendiri tak mampu nak sediakan. Ingat , Maryam akan bersedih kalau dia nampak mama dia mcm ni kan.

    satu lagi mama, sentiasa bimbing abam hayesh, dia lagi terasa kehilangan adik/kawan baik dia . Klau mama sentiasa tenggelam dlm kesedihan, abam akan terasa terabai. Mmg kesedihan dan kerinduan itu tidak akan hilang sampai bila-bila. selagi hayat dikandung badan . Dah hampir 2 thn adik tggalkan saya, saya masih menangis bila teringatkan dia. Saya faham kepedihan mama, saya hanya kehilangan adik, tak dpt nak gambarkan klau saya diuji Allah kehilangan anak saya .

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  2. MayyonnizzJuly 12, 2010 at 5:59 PM

    sabarlah anis... allah loved ur precious maryam sama mcm allah luvs my sweetheart Alanna... there's no words to heal the pain...we shud have sujud bersyukur..coz i still have my lil nadime & u have abg hayesh... we r ibu yng diuji...we r d choosen one.. take care ur self..its has been 1 month and 1 week since Alanna left me...& im lonely too..just like u... take care again!!!

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  3. MamaMaryamJuly 12, 2010 at 9:38 PM

    same to you. kitaorang dah 4 bulan hidup tanpa Maryam, u baru sebulan lebih. semoga u pon kuat. im gaining strength as days passed, and i pray you will too.

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